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These essays are written by individuals like you. If you would like to submit something here, write to

jade@cs.utoronto.ca

Also note that the opinions expressed in these essays are the opinions of the authors, and not necessarily of SAFE. This is intended as a forum.

Cain's To Blame by Daniel M. Huff. This essay explores the origins of abuse and argues that we should concentrate on healing rather than on blaming the abuser or the victim. A well-written, intelligent read.
It is Time to Speak Up About the Realities of Family Violence by Eric W. Towle. This essay discusses his experiences as a clinical psychologist who served many abused men. He discusses his concern with how domestic violence is being treated and talks about how we view domestic violence.

Books

I've read this book, and strongly recommend it.
Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence
by Philip W. Cook
Praeger Publishers 1997
Westport, CT
ISBN: 0-275-95862-0

A website with information about the book is located at: http://www.abusedmen.com
If you would like to buy the book, please buy through: Amazon.com. By ordering through this link to Amazon, you'll also make a 5% donation to SAFE, at no extra cost to you. (We're offering this book in association with Amazon.com). Here is Amazon's summary of the book: "When most people think of domestic violence, images of battered women or abused children come to mind. But there is another side to this issue that is not as familiar--abused men. This unique book is the first to comprehensively examine this important but neglected social issue. Already praised by a diverse spectrum of readers--from "Dear Abby's" Abigail Van Buren, to the nation's leading domestic violence researcher, to those in law enforcement and counseling--this work is sure to spark controversy and discussion. It offers gripping, emotional stories, self-help for victims, and provocative insight into public issues, and provides a basic reference source for professionals. Abused Men presents practical solutions for reducing domestic violence, whether its victims are male or female. "
Phil Cook, the author of Abused Men, also has produced a brochure for use by organizations and individuals. A copy is available to anyone who sends a Self-Addressed Stamped Envelope (SASE) and 25 cents to: Brochure-Arrowdot Productions PO Box 951 Tualatin, OR 97062. More information is also available through http://www.abusedmen.com.
Same Sex Domestic Violence Bibliography lists a lot of books dealing with same sex violence.

Websites

Sites which deal with battered men:

Husband Battering - David Throop's pages contain a library of information on husband and partnership abuse. Visit this web page before you look anywhere else. It contains a lot of useful information!
David Gross' Notes on husband battering. Well-reasoned overview of studies on husband abuse and an analysis of society's perceptions of it.
Jeff Gibb'sabuse webpages.
The Lace Curtain complains that men aren't given a voice in the media around issues like domestic violence.
Woman Trouble talks about the politics of domestic violence and offers a few tips for men in DV situations.
Special Report: No place to run for male victims of domestic abuse was a front-page article in the Detroit News. This is one of the best articles I've seen on the issue. It shows the complexity of the issue and several different perspectives on the issue. (4/20/97)
Women's abuse excuse probably should be rethought is an editorial by Cathy Young that talks about pardons and prison cases and how they relate to domestic violence. (5/11/97)
Detroit News columnist talks about DV arrests of women and how the media has portrayed it.
LAAW provides "legal aid for women and men trying to remove themselves from an abusive situation. Legal aid is often necessary to secure stay-away orders, obtain child support, settle child custody issues, initiate separation and divorce proceedings, and collect the court-required documentation of the emotional, sexual and physical abuse. LAAW provides a revolving fund for legal aid. Recipients reimburse up to 100% of the monetary assistance provided and/or volunteer their time to assist others affected by domestic violence. Legal aid is provided regardless of race, nationality, gender, social status, orientation, or education level."
Men's Educational Support Association (MESA) is a father's rights organization that has some information gleaned from studies on domestic violence.
MENWEB contains several articles about domestic violence against men, including an article from the founder of the first modern women's shelter in the world, and several others.
Sites which deal with same-sex violence:
- Advocates for Abuse and Battered Lesbians contains information and resources.
- Advocates for Abused and Battered Lesbians has info and resources for lesbian women in abusive relationships.

Research and Articles

research is in blue,

articles are in purple

Behind closed doors: domestic violence. (gay domestic violence)
Friess, Steve (Dec. 9, 1997). The Advocate, 48-53.
General discussion of domestic violence is gay and lesbian relationships.
Attributions about spouse abuse: it matters who the batterers and victims are.
Harris, Richard Jackson, Cynthia A. Cook (April 1994). Sex Roles, 553-565.
A study of how people judge and perceive partnership violence. Compared battered men, battered women, and battered gay men.
The Intergenerational Transmission of Marital Aggression
Kalmuss
Surveyed 2,143 adults and found that the "modeling of marital aggression does not appear to be sex specific". Thus, a boy who observes his father hitting his mother is just as likely to engage in violence acts as an adult as a daughter who observes her father hitting her mother.
The Truth About Domestic Violence: A Falsely Framed Issue.
McNeely, R.L. and Robinson-Simpson, G. (1987):
Social Work 32(6), pp. 485-490.
An overview of research about domestic violence.
Women Behaving Badly.
Pearson, Patricia (Sept. 1997):
Toronto: Saturday Night, pp. 90-97.
Well-written article that includes several men's stories, information on the Easton Alliance, and an excellent overview of the politics behind this issue.
Prevalence and Stability of Physical Agression Between Spouses: a Longitudinal Analysis.
O'Leary, Daniel, Barling, Arias, Rosenbaum, Malone,
and Tyree (1989):
Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology 57(2): 263-268.
Found that women had a higher prevalence of aggressive/violent acts than men do in married couples.
Societal Change and Change in Family Violence from 1975 to 1985 as Revealed by Two National Surveys.
Strauss, M. and Gelles, R. (1986):
Journal of Marriage and the Family 48:465-479.
Showed almost identical rates of husband-to-wife and wife-to-husband violence in "overall violence" and "severe violence" categories. This study is well-known

List of 18 studies which show that men are abused as much as women. These are all scholarly articles. This list shows what the sample population of each group was and how the data was broken up. Like the author says, "read the research before you form an opinion".

67 articles and studies which show that men are abused as much as women. This mixes in scholarly articles with magazine articles, newspaper clippings, and books.

http://www.vix.com/pub/men/battery/studies/oleary-etal.html is a summary of statistics from research on domestic violence. It mostly addresses the question, "how common is domestic violence against men and against women". The following are references that I haven't looked through personally. Many were provided courtesy of the Men's Rights Resource List, maintained by Peter Zohrab.

The Underside of Married Life; power, influence and violence
Adler, E.S. (1981):
in L.H.Bowker (ed.) Women and Crime in
America. New York: Macmillan.
First Large-Scale Study Reveals Elder Abuse is Primarily by Wives Against Husbands.
Author Unknown (1986):
Marriage and Divorce Today, December 15, 1986.
How Can I Admit I Am a Battered Husband: Special Report
Author Unknown (1993):
Best Magazine, April 15, 1993.
A Plea for the Battered Husband.
Bates, R.E. (1981):
Family Law
11:92-94.
Family Violence and Psychiatric Disorder.
Bland, R. and Orn,H. (1986):
Canadian
Journal of Psychiatry 31(2):129-137.
Domestic Violence: The Community Response.
Borowski, M., Murch, M. and Walker, V. (1983):
London:Tavistock.
Premarital Violence: A Study of Abuse within Dating Relationships of College Students.
Breen, R.N. (1985):
The University of Texas at Arlington.
Interspousal Violence.
Brinkerhoff, M. and Lupri, E. (1988):
Canadian Journal of Sociology 13(4).
Violence in Adolescent Dating Relationships Common, New Study Reveals.
Brockopp, Karen (1986):
Sexuality Today Newsletter, pp 2-3, Dec. 22, 1986.
When Battered Women Kill.
Browne, Angela (1987):
London: Collier Macmillan. New York:Free Press.
Are Men Victims?
Burstall, Emma (1993):
New Woman, August 1993.
Violence At Home.
Chesanow, Neil (1992):
New Woman, February, pp. 96-98.
Men Get Battered, Too.
Edwards, Joe (1992):
Chat Magazine, April 18,
1992.
Intersexual Violence in Monroe County, New York.
Ensminger-Vanfossen, B. (1979):
Victimology 4(2): 299-305.
The Cost of Escaping Domestic Violence.
Garcia, Jane (1991):
Los Angeles Times, May 6, 1991.
The Violent Home: A Study of Physical Aggression Between Husbands and Wives.
Gelles, R.J. (1974):
Beverly Hills: Sage
Publications.
Domestic Criminal Violence.
Gelles, R.J. (1982): in Marvin E.
Wolfgang:"Criminal Violence". Beverly Hills:Sage
Publications, pp 201-235.
Intimate Violence: The Causes and Consequences of Abuse in the American Family.
Gelles, R.J. and Strauss, Murray A. (1988):
New York: Simon & Schuster Inc..
"Current Controversies on Family Violence".
Gelles, R.J. and Loseke, D. (eds.):
Atlanta: Sage Women's Educational Press.
Riding the Donkey Backwards: Men as the Unacceptable Victims of Marital Violence.
George, M.J. (1994):
Journal of Men's Studies Vol.3 No.2 (November 1994)>
Wife Battering: a Systems Theory Approach.
Giles, Sims, J. (1983)
New York:
Guilford Press.
Beaten Husbands.
Greenfield, Margaret (1992):
Women's Post, p.2, July 8, 1992.
Men who Beat the Men who Love Them
Island, D., & Letellier, P. (1991).
New York: Harrington Park. Discusses battered gay men.
Women Who Kill.
Jones, Anne (1981):
New York: Fawcett Crest, Ballantine Books.
Interpersonal Reliability of Reports of Marital Violence.
Jouriles, E.N. and O'Leary, K.D.(1985):
Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology 53:419-421.
6 Ft., Macho, and Beaten by his Wife.
Kirsta, Alix (1989): Sunday Times, December 10, 1989.
Could You Batter Him?
Kirsta, Alix (1991):
New Woman, January 1991.
Women Against Men: An Examination of Domestic Violence Based on an Analysis of Official Data and National Victimization Data.
McLeod, M. (1984): Justice Quarterly 1(2):171-193.
Fatal Violence Among Spouses in the United States.
Mercy, J.A., and Saltzman, L.E. (1989):
1976-85. American Journal of Public Health
79(5):595-599.
Spouse Abuse: Incidence and Relationship to Selected Demographic Variables.
Nisonoff, L. and Bitman, I. (1979):
Victimology 4, pp. 131-140.
Premarital Physical Aggression.
O'Leary, Daniel, Arias, Rosenbaum, and Barling:
State University of New York at Stony Brook, and Syracuse University.
The`Battered Husband Syndrome': Social Problem or Much Ado About Little?
Pagelow, M.D. (1985): Marital Violence, Monograph 31, Sociological Review. Johnson, N. and Routledge, Kegan Paul eds., London, pp. 172-195.
Violent Betrayal: Partner Abuse in Lesbian Relationships
Renzetti, C. (1992).
Newbury Park, CA: Sage.
Violence in the Home.
Rooke, Margaret (1991): Radio Times March 16-22, p.8.
When Battered Women Use Violence: Husband Abuse or Self Defence? Saunders, D.G. (1986): Violence and Victims 1:47-60.
The Violent Woman in: "Violent Men, Violent Couples".
Shupe, A. (1986): Stacey and Hazzlewood (eds.), Lexington Books.
Do Only Women Bleed?
Smith, Angela (1992): Guardian, Women's Section, p.1, July 15th.
Adult Domestic Violence.
Smith, S., Baker, D., Buchan, A., and Bodiwala, G. (1992): Health Trends 24:97-99.
And Then She Hit Me.
Stacey, Sarah, and Cantacuzino, Maria (1993): Esquire, p. 84.
Statistical Abstract of the United States 1987, table 277.
The Battered Husband Syndrome.
Steinmetz, Suzanne K. (1977a): Victimology 2,
1977-1978, P. 499.
Wifebeating, Husband Beating -- a Comparison of the Use of Physical Violence Between Spouses to Resolve Marital Fights.
Steinmetz, Suzanne K. (1977b):
In Roy, M. (ed.) "Battered Women".
New York:Van Nostrand Rheinhold, pp 63-72.
The Cycle of Violence: Assertive, Aggressive, and Abusive Family Interaction.
Steinmetz, Suzanne K. (1977c): New York: Praeger Press.
Women and Violence: Victims and Perpetrators.
Steinmetz, Suzanne K. (1980): American Journal of Psychotherapy 34(3): 334-350.
Husband Battering.
Steinmetz, Suzanne K. and Lucca, Joseph S. (1988):
In: V. Van Hasselt (et al.)
(eds.). "Handbook of Family Violence". New
York:Plenum Press. pp. 233-246.
Husband Abuse and the Woman Offender are Important Problems.
Strauss, M. (1993):
In: Gelles, R.J. and Loseke, D.
(eds.):"Current Controversies on Family Violence".
Atlanta: Sage Women's Educational Press.
Wife Beating: How Common and Why?
Strauss, M. (1977): Victimology 2:443-458, 1977-78.
Behind Closed Doors: Violence in American Families.
Strauss, M. and Gelles, R., and Steinmetz, S.K. (1980):
New York: Doubleday.
Using Couple Data as a Methodological Tool: The Case of Marital Violence.
Szinovacz, M.E. (1983):
Journal of Marriage and the
Family 45(3): 633-644.
Clemency Granted to 25 Women Convicted for Assault or Murder.
Wilkerson, Isabel (1990):
New York Times, December 21, 1990.
Beyond the Rolling Pin: Domestic Violence and the Other Side.
Wolff, Isobell (1992):
Spectator Magazine, P. 22, November 28.

Other domestic violence pages. This sites contain a lot of useful information, even though they are primarily for women in DV situations.

United States Domestic Violence Hotlines is a list of national and statewide hotlines.
Nashville Police Department DV Page contains practical, educational information on domestic violence, such as indicators of DV, what stages are common, why people stay in DV relationships, how to plan for when you're thinking about leaving, what to do when you're in a fight, etc... Some of the best practical information that I've come across!
Safety Planning - how to protect your friend or yourself.
Blain Nelson's Abuse Pages contains a wealth of information on domestic violence. If you want to understand the dynamics of abuse, this is a good place to start.
Survival Home Page is a listing of resources for rape, domestic violence, child abuse, etc... Also a mailing list.
Higher Education Center Against Violence is a clearinghouse of information and resources on domestic violence.
- Domestic Violence Factoids. A lot of DV statistics are thrown around that aren't based on anything. This debunks a lot of the "facts" of domestic violence. I highly recommend reading this if you are interested in DV issues.
- Electronic Databases: online statistics from places like the Bureau of Justice. Useful for research.
- News Groups & Discussion Lists: the list of discussion groups is especially useful.
- Global Links on Violence: contains links on all sorts of violence (child abuse, domestic violence, elder abuse, gay/lesbian bashing, etc...)
- Violence Against Women: an incredible amount of information. Contains information on domestic violence and legal resources. This is a meta-list.
Domestic Violence Page provides a lot of personal stories and responses to domestic violence.
Shattered Love Broken lives contains numerous articles on domestic violence.
SafetyNet Domestic Violence Resources contains statistics, bibliographies, links, and NY phone numbers. The resources and information are useful, especially if you're a woman.
Nonviolent Alternatives Counseling Services counsels abusive men. Also contains information on domestic violence.
Law Runner is a search engine for legal documents.
Domestic Violence Laws in Michigan unfortunately is not so gender-neutral...
Domestic Violence is a fairly well-written overview of domestic violence, including history, prevalence, etc... written mostly for counselors and therapists.
ABC News 20/20 did a show on battered men, and the transcript should be available here or here.

Other Perspectives:

The Truth About Domestic Violence also asserts that men are not abuse victims as often as women.

Miscellaneous:

Do Fathers Have the Edge in Divorce? discusses whether or not this is true.
To Hell And Back talks about male rape.