This page will give you information on where to look for these services. However, before you look at the rest of this page, there are a few things that we would like to mention.
First of all, your situation is not unique, and you are not alone. We hide our family problems very well, but research has shown that domestic violence is fairly common (see the Resources link at the top of this page for more information on this research and more.) Numerous studies have been done on this topic, and they've shown that domestic violence is gender-neutral. It happens, with almost equal rates, to men and women, straight or gay. Thus, even though it seems like you're alone sometimes, there really are a lot of people out there who have been through the same situation and are willing to help. Many of them are listed on this page below.
Also, take the time to understand how these relationships work. Because abuse has been studied so much, there is a lot of information out there to help you understand what you're going through or what you've been through. The Resources link at the top of this page is a good place to look.
We hope these pages are helpful. If they're not, let us know. If they are, let us know that too. In any case, we wish you luck, and we're here to support you.
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"Lesbian and Gay Domestic Violence: A Resource". Phone 520-881-7201. This place is supposed to be fairly well-known locally.
"We wanted to let you know about our newly formed organization - FAIR PLAY,
INC Fair Play, Inc. is a not for profit organization dedicated to providing
honest and thorough investigative services. The organization works
specifically with issues of abuse, neglect or exploitation of senior citizens,
children, women or men.
Fair Play, Inc. is made up of private investigators that have been in the
business for a number of years. The founder, Nancy J. Barnes has been an
investigator for 25 years and had her own practice for 14 years. She also has
access to a worldwide network of investigators through Global Investigators
Network (G.I.N.).
The website for Fair Play, Inc. has been up for 2 months and we are
attempting to cross link with other organizations in similar areas as ours.
If this would interest you please contact us by e-mail at fplayinc@aol.com or
call (888)39-TRUTH. Also feel free to visit our website at fairplayinc.com."
Battered Women's Alternatives
Delson-Kokish Associates -- (707)441-8626, http://www.northcoast.com/~dka/, dka@northcoast.com
Second Chance -- Support Groups (510)792-4357
This is one of the extremely few shelters in the entire US which offer help to victims without discriminating based on gender. Their 24-hour crisis line number: (805)945-6736.
Gay & Lesbian Community Center -- (213)464-7400
Sojourn Shelter (no contact information. Please let me know if you find it).
Mid-Peninsula Support Network for Battered Women -- (415)940-7855
Claudia Dias, director of "Changing Courses" in North Highlands, a suburb of
Sacramento California, has anger management groups for both men and women, and works with women who are abusive to their partners. Their phone number
is (916) 332-5056.
The Domestic Violence Hotline 1-888-305-SAFE (7233) is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and provides referrals to a variety of services such as: Domestic Violence shelter bed availability, Counseling services, Support Group services, Emergency Food and Clothing, Legal services, Anti-Stalking information, and other available community resources.
I called and talked with an employee there, and they provide services for everyone -- men, women, straight or gay. They also told me that there is a shelter for gay men and lesbian women there (call 619-692-2077) and the YWCA has counseling services for men that are abused (call 619-270-4504). Let me know what kind of experiences you have with these services, please.
Community United Against Violence (CUAV)
San Francisco Network for Battered Lesbians and Bisexual Women
W.O.M.A.N. (Women Organized to Make Abuse Non-existent), Inc.
The Montrose Resource Center - several men have received services here
The Florida Men's Resource Center has a list of resources for men in Florida. Women and children are "welcome also", according to the web page. The Florida Men's Resource is a SAFE Affiliate.
Here are some resources if you're in Florida. These resources said that they help battered men:
There is an organization there called End Violence Now, which offers support services for victims and education for perpetrators of same-sex domestic violence.
The Ogeechee Judicial Circuit Domestic Violence Shelter offers services to both men and women. Men do not stay at our shelter;
however, they are able to provide shelter in a safe place for them at
another location in the community. They have advocated for several male
victims of domestic violence in the past three years of our existence (as of 1998). (912) 764-4605 crisis line
Emerge, the nation's "oldest agency treating batterers" has a group for lesbian and bisexual abusers, and they may have one for for gay male abusers by now. I don't have any contact information for this, so please let me know if you find it.
The Fenway Community Health Center has an entire department devoted to gay-bashing and domestic violence in gay/lesbian couples. Their
contact info is 617-267-0900, or http://www.fchc.org/.
There is a group trying to set up services for heterosexual abused men. See http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/batteredhusbandssupport.
The SAFE group in Michigan has set up a national hotline for battered men and lesbian women to call: (616)941-0825. Requests for help can be written to jgibbs@torchlake.com.
Cumberland Heights is an alcohol and drug treatment center with a court services component. The court services program offers many different classes for court-ordered clients, and one of them is domestic violence classes. The classes are for men and women who have been arrested for domestic violence charges AND who have substance abuse issues. Substance abuse issues ranges from addiction to using during
the incident that got them arrested. Not all have serious problems with alcohol or drugs. They do not offer victims services; all of those are referred to local shelters. The program is a 6 month program and the clients meet one time weekly. If someone needs information on any of these services, the number is 1-800-707-8882.
Cumberland Heights also seems to have a program for women perpetrators of violence. Contact the program coordinator, karen Bybee, at (615)353-4398.
Founded in 1980, the New York City Gay and Lesbian Anti-Violence Project serves lesbian and gay crime victims through counseling,
advocacy, information and referrals. Let me know whether they serve domestic violence victims well.
The Women's Shelter (hotline number 817-460-5566) will help battered men. To make a counseling appointment, call (817)548-0583. I have heard of at least one man receiving services here.
The Women's Haven, hotline number: (817)535-6464. They will help battered men.
The Family Place, (212)941-1991, will offer help to battered men.
"Vermont Network Against Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault has a
statewide, 24-hour hotline for domestic violence at 1-800-228-7395
(for sexual assault, call 1-800-489-7273). The Vermont Network can
offer victims counseling and short-term advice, provide transportation
to a shelter, and make referrals to other services. Currently, 16
different organizations are available through the Vermont Network
"umbrella," some dealing with sexual assault and some with domestic
violence. The Vermont Network also has a website at
http://www.vnadvsa.together.com, with links to most of the other
Vermont organizations.
I am not aware of any Vermont organizations that deal specifically
with same-sex domestic violence, and, as might be expected, most of
the groups under the Vermont Network umbrella seem to be geared
towards women."
Advocates for Abused and Battered Lesbians is an organization that may provide some sort of services: http://www.isomedia.com/homes/AABL/.
Apparently, the Center for Battered Women in Snohomish County has a twenty four hour crisis line for victims of domestic violence. Advocates are trained to talk to callers of all genders and sexual preferences providing safety planning, advocacy based counseling and community resource referral. The phone number is (425)252-2873. (7/6/98)
The Washington State Domestic Violence Hotline can be reached toll-free at 800-562-6025. Their URL is http://www.domestic-violence.org, and the email is csn@willapabay.org. Their website is almost completely in gender-neutral language, and their mandate is inclusive of all abuse victims (and possibly perpetrators as well).
If you live in Australia, see the list of (contains other countries as well) and information for men that are abused. Also see here for more Australian hotlines.
"Safe Home is an emergency shelter for women with or without children in
crisis. Our priority is to abusive situations. Although we can only
house women and children we do offer services to anyone no matter what
gender or sexual preference is. We offer a 24hr help line where will
offer support to anyone. We are located in High Level Alberta Canada
and our help line # is 403-926-3899 or toll free at 1-888-926-0301."
The Family of Men Support Society operates a telephone crisis line for
people wanting support and infiormation for abused men. They have offered
service for 7 years. They can be reached at Family of Men <51820620@3web.net> or by phone at (403) 242-4077.
Peer Support Services for Abused Women, located at 301, 501 18th Ave SW, Calgary, Alberta, Canada T2S 0C7, is a peer-based service provider that offers
services to all women, but have recently applied for funding to develop
a public awareness, education campaign about same sex abuse as well as
money to offer peer based support to battered lesbian and bi-sexual
women who have left their relationship. They are also hoping to produce a
video that can be used by service providers and potential consumers.
They can be contacted at: (403)228-0293 fax: (403)228-0438.
The Eastern Alliance for the Prevention of Family Violence is the first Canadian family violence prevention agency and charity for abused men. It is also perhaps the first organization of its kind in the world. You can contact them by phone: (416)691-8269, fax: (416)691-1113, mail: 97 Main Street, Toronto ON Canada M4E 2V6, and e-mail: easton@geocities.com. They offer a support group, referrals, and more.
Education Wife Assault offers educational services for women and same-sex couples (ironically, the only group they seem to not serve is straight men). http://www.womanabuseprevention.com
There is a Vancouver empowerment group for abused gay men.
The Victoria Men's Centre, has information and a discussion circle
for men, and makes referals to counselling and other services. There's also another group starting, called the "Well Society", which is setting up a retreat
center for men, due to be open in a couple of months. Their phone recording line is at (250) 370-4636, and address is Box 8082, Victoria, B.C. V8W 3R7.
"EVOLVE is a resource center for family violence. It began as an outreach
from gay and lesbian right's activism as far as I know. Many members
active in that community are also active in EVOLVE. They have really
excellent programs for battering men, anger management and so forth. As I
wrote in my previous note, ten years ago they scoffed at the idea of women
produced violence but they now have a male victim advocate. She works only
part time and you get referred to her by leaving a message on her
answering machine. Not exactly a great resource in a crisis. However it is
miles better than before.
Their number is (204) 784-4070. You might want to also add that you can
get a referral to them if you are a battered man by calling the Osbourne
House Crisis Line for Battered Women. That number is in big bold letters
in the front page of the telephone book and people would be likely to
remember that in a crisis. Their number is (204) 942-3052. They no longer
laugh at men calling for help but now refer them to this EVOLVE program. I
have referred three men who contacted me via e-mail in Manitoba who
subsequently contacted EVOLVE for help. I asked them to keep in touch and
let me know iof things went badly so I would stop referring. These men
never contacted me again so I have to assume it was a good resource. My
brother and his wife went through the program and speak very highly of it."
"Though empowerment of women is given priority because women
are the main victims of human rights violations and historical
discrimination, even in relative peace times, the organisation has
over the recent years also addressed abuse of men as the number of
reported cases are rapidly increasing. If you need help or advice,
please contact the following:"
ADVICE DESK DURBAN
ADVICE DESK ZULULAND -
ADVICE DESK LADYSMITH -
Men's Advice Line & Enquiries (M.A.L.E.)
1. Support on the Internet
subscribe safe-support jade@cs.utoronto.ca in the body of your message (but type your e-mail address instead of jade@cs.utoronto.ca)
subscribe safe-admin jade@cs.utoronto.ca in the body of your message (but type your e-mail address instead of jade@cs.utoronto.ca)
2. Local Services (Shelters, Support Groups, Hotlines...)
This section contains services for battered men (straight, gay, and bi), lesbian women, and for both the abused and abusing person.
24 hour Crisis Line: 510-676-2845
Antioch: 510-757-8200
Concord: 510-930-8300
Richmond: 510-233-2420
Legal Advocacy Program: 510-372-3211
"They have a group for lesbians who are or have been battered. For info call
the 24 hour Crisis Line. The legal advocacy program will help with stuff like
restraining orders. The Domestic Violence Treatment program provides
individual counseling for batterers."
Provides services for abusive women.
Project Eden -- Support Groups Office (510)887-0566
These are services for abusive women.
Services for battered lesbians & gay men.
Services for battered lesbians.
Services for battered lesbians.
Gay Men's Domestic Violence Project
Office: 415-777-5500
Crisis Line: 415-333-4357 (415-333-HELP)
Provides support groups, peer counseling, and paralegal help in getting
restraining orders for battered gay men.
3543-18th Street, #28
Voicemail: 415-281-0276
Office: 415-864-4777
Crisis Line: 415-864-4722
Provides support groups, peer counseling, and paralegal help in getting
restraining orders for battered lesbians.
Montrose, Colorado
Phone: 249-2486
Web Site: http://home.rmi.net/~mrcdv/
SHELTERS (407 area code)
COUNSELING (407 area code)
AABL - The Northwest Network of Bisexual, Trans and Lesbian Survivors of
Abuse
PO Box 22869
Seattle WA 98122
(206) 568-7777 (Office number and crisis line)
Services are available Mon-Fri, 9-6
P O BOX 65227
RESERVOIR HILLS 4090
TELEPHONE
(031) 2629673
PVT BAG X1001,
KWADLANGEZWA
TELEPHONE (0351) 93911 EXT 2145
P O BOX 3703, LADYSMITH, 3370.
TELEPHONE:
0361 313151
0181 644-9914
Monday & Wednesday 9AM to Midnight
(answer machine all other times)
Write to: Les Davidson
PO Box 402, Sutton, Surrey, SM1 3TG
"Information for and about Male Victims of Domestic Violence"
Last updated: «Ž²ïÃÀÕ, 24 ›í줳Ž› 1999
Copyright 1999 * Jade Rubick * All rights reserved.
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